- Showering: Who knew that it would be such a struggle to get a shower in some days. Or I can associate guilt with not showering--I am paranoid and feel guilty when I feel that I start to get "ripe." (Quick Side note: I have yet to go more than two days without a shower, so don't picture me in soiled clothes covered in spit up and my hair lookin like a cave woman with some body stench that is unidentifiable--that hasn't happened-yet.) I'm talking about getting past the point of your own B.O. comfort zone. The guilt comes into play when Josie is feeding and I know her nose is right up in my armpit--hey she put herself in that situation for not taking a nap longer than 10 seconds. The paranoia sets in when Andrew gets home and is holding Josie, "She stinks." (Deep down inside I totally know its not her, but I blame it on her anyway--hey I can do that until she defend herself). Showering is now a rush thing--I have mastered the 2 minute shower.
- Meal time: I have to force myself to get enough water down in a day let alone eating. It seems some days I will eat my lunch and dinner together (I should be 600 lbs by now) or have 20 snacks to satisfy one hunger. I obviously do not purposly skip meals--I love my food. Its just crazy how my body can hide my hunger because Josie has to eat or diaper change gets trump card. I will look at the clock in the morning and next time I do 6 hours have gone by and I need to start thinking about dinner!
- Breastfeeding: I wish there was some way to prepare yourself better for breastfeeding (or maybe you could have a built in gauge letting you know if the tank is full or empty.) Wouldn't that be convenient. There is really no schedule. Sometimes Josie will feed for 12 minutes, sometimes for 4 and be completely satisfied each time. The worst is when she just wants a "snack" and feeds for 1 minute and then leaves me with a "leaky water-balloon" and forces me to pump the rest. The past few days have been -snack throughout the day, days- She will feed for like 4 minutes then be done and want to eat again every hour (this continues through the night). Then the next day she will feed like a pig so I will pump to stock up the fridge in case my supply runs low. Just kidding-back to 4 minute feedings and a fridge full of 6-5oz bottles that get dumped down the drain.
- I wrote this post a few weeks ago, and have made the permanent switch to pumping--upcoming post about that experience.
- Productivity: I have always been a busy person. It has taken me the most effort to get used to the change in my daily productivity.
- A pre-Josie productive day: Me showered--(I use body lotion and my hair done), Laundry done and put away, house vacuumed, Dishes washed and put away, Homework complete,Hot dinner on the table when Andrew gets home.
- A post-Josie productive day: (Choose ONE of the following scenarios)
- Me Showered (no lotion, deodorant if I remember, and lucky to have product in my hair which stays in a permanent pony-tail)
- One load of laundry washed and made it in the dryer
- One side of the kitchen sink is empty
- The vacuum gets used once out of the five days I have been staring at it sitting in the middle of the living room.
- I log into the computer.
- I have some clue what dinner will be or at least have meat thawed.
Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't want it any other way than to stay home with my baby girl, and I know it will get easier. It would just be nice some days to do my thing. But it's probably God's way of making me slow down and take in every moment with my Josie, who seems to be growing at the speed of light.
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